Showing posts from April, 2024

Skin in the Game

  A long time ago I used to own a small development company w/a good friend of mine. I know, business partnerships with friends rarely work, but Chad and I not only have been friends since middle school, we also have had several business ventures together.  Each had been a grand adventure. Although our business ventures are no longer, Chad and I still enjoy our friendship.  One of the projects Chad and I had was a big abandoned building on Division and Logan downtown Grand Rapids. In the process of purchasing the building back in the early 2000's I can remember negotiating with Ed Kalus an old school real-estate investor.  Ed was probably in his 80's then. He was a shrewd businessman even in later years. It would have been interesting running into him when he was younger.  We met several times to talk about the purchase of his building. It was a huge project for Chad and me. It was a three story 18,000 sq. foot building that we were planning on gutting and converting into comme

Forcing the Position

  Square Peg Round Hole?! So, we're working on a grappling position in class called "knee on belly." It is what it sounds like. You're partner is on their back and you are on top w/your knee on their abdomen and your other leg either kneeling at their side or maybe your leg is out stretched w/your foot planted on the ground and your knee bent.  Tim and Kev were working on it and Tim was doing a good job at defending and denying the position. The question became, how do you get the (knee on belly) position when the person has a strong defense? My answer... Don't Force the Position!  (Unless you can of course... but you can't want it too badly!) If you want that technique to work too badly and attempt to force the position you begin to make yourself vulnerable to reversals, and other attacks.  So, what do you do? You either have to find a way to get around or through the persons defense. Maybe you may choose to do something else (another move or technique or com

The Art of Choice

  We live in a world of many many choices, yet when it comes to dealing with conflict we either offer too many, too few or not the right options. And that can lead to escalation. Although we have several communication strategies we teach in the PeaceWalker approach, here are some tips I picked up along the way.  Christmas reminds me of family and family reminds me of kids soooo...The example of today's tactic is for kids, but with minimal adjustment, it works equally well with adults too.  The Art of Giving Choices Giving people choices teaches them how to make decisions and develop their problem solving skills, shows them that their point of view is valued, and makes them feel more independent and in control of their lives. Although children often throw tantrums and/or whine when parents set limits, inwardly children truly yearn for parents to set and enforce them. When this is done in a way that also allows children to feel a sense of agency and control, it’s a win/win situation