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The Only Thing Better Than Experience...

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  An old story... A giant ship's engine broke down in the middle of nowhere and no one could repair it. They hired a Mechanical Engineer with over 40 years of experience. . He inspected the engine very carefully, from top to bottom. . After seeing everything, the engineer unloaded his small bag and pulled out a small hammer. . He knocked something gently for a few seconds. The engine came back to life again. The engine got fixed! . 7 days later the engineer mentioned that the total cost of repairing the giant ship was $20,000 to the ship owner. . "What?!" said the owner. . "You did almost nothing. Give us a detailed bill." . The answer was simple: (1) Tap with a hammer: $2 (2) Know where and how much to hit: $19,998 . That's the importance of appreciating one's expertise and experience...because those are the results of struggles, experiments, sweat & tears. . So, if you don't have the direct experience, learn from someone who does. This will sav

Flip Your Script

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Going from: "I don't have the time for it." TO "That's Not a Priority." That's a powerful switch!  A critical mindset shift when it comes to everything from your training to your relationships.  Teaching and training martial arts for as long as I have, I have a deep knowledge with the difference of these two perspectives. Heck, if I had a dollar for every time I heard a student say, "I'd love to train, but I just don't have the time..." When someone says that, it doesn't phase me anymore (hasn't for decades). I just think, "quit BSing yourself, because your not BSing me." Being Honest w/Yourself Try being brutally honest with yourself. Just say,  "That's Not a Priority." Or... "That's not a priority right now" When you do that enough times that it becomes a habit, you will be surprised how much it changes you.  When you start to be honest with yourself & others, you start to change at a

Gimme Three Steps

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  You know I'm getting ready to release my Essential Pistol Disarm Course, so I've been sharing some stories with my Private PeaceWalker Members. Most are personal stories from my Life. Some of them I haven't told anyone let alone written down. From stories of my mentors to run ins that I've survived over the years. Many of those experiences taught me principles and lessons that I continue to Live and teach today.  . Those experiences have really made my training more impactful. It's one thing hearing some concepts and practice in a safe gym environment, it's another thing all together, applying those principles in real time, when the stakes are much higher. . Experience is the hardest teacher. As an old parable says, Life gives you the test first and the lessons after. However, if you survive it, and learned what you needed to, then you have something to share. . And when it comes to most of the things taught in the PeaceWalker Private Membership, it's smar

Say What You Want...

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 Laird Hamilton doing what he does best Say What You Want... They're just watching what you DO! I was listening to a podcast with big wave surfing legend Laird Hamilton the other day. I am inspired by Laird, he's a 56 year old surfer who has a lot of insight and inspiration for people like us. Not surfing, but who are aging, but live an active life, full life.  On the episode I was listening to he said something that was profound for life and significant for conflict management. "Say what you want, they're just watching you." Now, when he said this, he was talking about raising kids. Meaning you can say what you want, but kids will mimic your actions.  This is significant on many levels regarding child rearing, in Life and believe it or not during conflict management. Matter of a fact, I wish I had more time to unpack this with you, but I don't really, so here's a shortened version. If you keep an eye (or ear) out for my podcast, this will be a topic on an

#1 Rule of an Argument

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I Got Into a Little Trouble... Last night I got into a little tift w/my significant other. Because I was gone since Friday, we hadn't spent any quality time together.  I was a little late getting over to her place yesterday and that ended up causing some static between the two of us... Uh oh! We ended up sorting things out and everything ended well, but things could have easily taken another direction. This is why the PeaceWalker Approach is so important. Yes, protecting yourself (and others) physically is important, however, to deal with the spectrum of conflict, you'll need more tools than that. In this case verbally and emotionally. In this case, we were both mad and off baseline. We had to dial things in and get to a spot where we could talk.  As we know, a verbal conflict can escalate. Most types of conflicts and threats we run into start out as a conversation, or at least have a verbal component to it. Which is why you need to have some emotional and verbal skills.  Here

Mask Up For Conflict!

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  Conflict Over Masks... Saturday one of my new academy members, Bob pulled me aside to tell me a story about putting his newly found PeaceWalker skills to work at his local gym. Even though Bob has only been training a couple weeks, he embraced our idea of what it means to be a PeaceWalker. He was telling me that he had his headphones on while he worked out, so he didn't notice the situation before it erupted.  Basically, the gym requires people to wear a mask while they are on premises. A hard charger came in to workout and didn't want to wear a mask. The young gal working there asked him to put one on. Upon hearing this, the guy blew a gasket and started yelling and making a scene.  Bob, told me he noticed that this guy was really starting to yell and get in this young gals face. Bob said that he was hoping that the guy would calm down or just leave. Neither of which happened.  So, Bob made one more lap and told himself that if this guy was still yelling at the gal, he'd

LaRusso & Lawrence in the Aisle

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Well, it's Monday again... Where did the weekend go? Last week I got some great correspondence back from you guys!  There's an email I received from Jim D., one of our PeaceWalker Community members, that I wanted to share with you. I think you will find it not just interesting, but beneficial too!   Danny LaRusso  or  Johnny Lawrence?! =) Craig, Just a quick note; I laughed this morning when I read your email recounting Jenn Franson's recent checkout aisle experience. Not a derisive laugh by any means, but one of honest amusement. Anyway, my source of amusement was imagining in my mind's eye, as I was reading her account, of the very real possibility of one or more burly, macho guys in proximity watching tongue-tied with mouths agape as this little wisp of a gal took charge of a nasty encounter with the potential of getting even nastier!  (Okay, maybe they wouldn't have been "burly" in the traditional sense, but next to Jenn, even a 5'-10" 150 pou

Clean Up in Aisle 3

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  I received an email from one of our long time PeaceWalker members, Jennifer Franson. She had an incident happen recently while at a clothing store. She tells how her training helped her deal with the conflict that ensued.  Here's Jenn's Story: What Did You Just Say To Me?! There is a lot going on right now and it is confusing and we need people with clarity and confidence now more than ever. For that, I suggest TRAINING!  Let me share with you something that happened that led me to that conclusion! This last week I was at a makeup store with my daughter and we were returning a gift. We were waiting patiently for the cashiers computer to get unstuck when... Suddenly a woman enters the store storming to the cashier, Let's call her Lucy. So Lucy comes in and asking her where the d boldly asks for the manager, "You know the manager who deals with secret shoppers etc..." The cashier girl tried to help her but none of it was to her liking and so she stormed off into t

Against the Current

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It was a warm, sunny day. I took off early from working. It had been a long week and I needed some time to myself.  I went out to Hoffmaster Park, just North of Grand Haven, in West Michigan. A place I have been going to since I was young. My folks always had a boat and docked it in Spring Lake, so, we pretty much lived out there in the summer time.  I'm no stranger to water.  Luckily, because I'm self employed, I can get out to the beach during times when no one is around... Just the way I like it! As I  park my car, I see that there weren't too many other vehicles in the lot. Perfect, I thought! I walk out to a spot, lay out my towel and go hit the waves.  The water was refreshing. A little cool, but my body adjusted quickly. It felt good in the August heat.  I swam out maybe fifty yards or so from shore and quickly lost track of time.   In a short while, the wind picked up a bit. The water went from fairly smooth to having a bit of a chop. I was starting to get a bit tir

The Rorschach Test

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  I got a lot of interesting responses from a few of those blogs I wrote in January. Many accusations of what people thought I said or meant. This was my original intent in writing that email in the first place.  In many respects that email was like The Rorschach test, more commonly known as the 'Ink Blot Test.' What is the Ink Blot Test? It's a test in which respondents are asked to look at ambiguous inkblot images and then describe what they see. The test is frequently portrayed as a way of revealing a person's unconscious thoughts, motives, desires or perspective. Yesterday's email seemed to have very much the same affect on people. And that was my entire point.  There are aspects of where we are at right now that model this test. You may see the exact same thing the person next to you sees, but get something totally different out of it.  We are all conditioned to our identity, biases and group affiliation... or tribe. We are living in a time I call Neo-Tribalism