Tuesday, January 21, 2020

Self Defense in a War Zone!

I had an interesting conversation last night.

I'm not sure exactly how we got on the subject, but I was sharing stories of some of the guys I've done work with either in security, training or teaching.

In this industry, it's common to run into soldiers, contractors or vet who seen some combat.

First of all, I want to get one thing straight, regardless if I agree w/their approach, I appreciate their service to this country and I respect the experience that they had during their tour(s) of duty...

But, some of perspective these guys are bringing to the civilian and law enforcement communities have to be filtered, because not all of their ideals or tactics are suited for anything outside of a war zone...

Some of the perspectives and ethics could be even be considered questionable in those areas.

Don't Misunderstand...

Don't miss understand, we can learn tons of useful things from soldiers, ex-soldiers, contractors and vets...

However, don't forget that environment, circumstance and context matter...


It's easy to get into the training mindset that in order to protect yourself, it's 'all out war' so to speak...

But don't forget that if you are a civilian, law enforcement, first responder, or some type of private security, sh*t's going to go down differently that it will if you are serving over in Afghanistan, Iraq or any other war zone...

You need different skill sets for the types of conflict and (most) types of violence you run up against in the Social and Urban environment of the cities and suburbs where YOU LIVE...

~ Workplace, school, home.
~ Planes, Trains & automobiles.
~ Parking lots, restaurants, concerts & other public places.

Yes, it is possible that you may have a room clear in there on a really bad and rare, day. Maybe (a BIG Maybe) you win the lotto in reverse and are a part of some type of active assailant or terrorist incident.

Regardless, the way you would engage and handle even these types of situations as a civilian (especially unarmed) will vary (greatly) from how a soldier or spec ops team would approach it.

Urban Warfare v. Just Urban

The point isn't to put down or diminish the training that comes from soldiers or LEO's, it's just to help you PeaceWalkers understand that just because it's proven in a "War Zone" it doesn't mean that it's always best suited for use for your every circumstance...

I encourage you to go out and get training for the more extreme incidents...

But, don't neglect or ignore training in the situations you are much more likely to run up against in your life.

Not to mention these are situations that often escalate into, could be prevented by or are red flags to those bigger circumstances as well.

You have to make sure that you are training for the types of situations that YOU are more likely to run into in the environment of your real world!

Most are going to be social and deal with attitude, awareness and communication skills. Probably w/o the usage of a weapon...

Things like:

~ Deescalating an argument
~ Handling a road rager
~ Basic 'Street Smarts' & not looking like an easy target
~ An employee gets belligerent & all worked up (but NOT an Active Shooter)
~ Someone who doesn't take NO for an answer
~ A rude (but not violent) drunk
~ Someone bullying you or your wife at work
~ Someone bullying your kid at school
~ Someone's following you or your daughter

Maybe Things Do Get Physical:

~ You breaking up a fight (Teacher! Parent! Family!)
~ You get mugged
~ Some assaults you or your wife
~ You have to escort someone out of your workplace, home or school

I have watched us as a society get very focused on Active Shooting, Terrorist and other More Extreme (but rarer) incidents...

Yes, of course train how to deal with those things!

But for heavens sake, don't neglect the training necessary to effectively handle the (way) more common types of conflicts and violence that can easily escalated into a lethal encounter!

Develop a well rounded skill set and spend the most amount of time and resources on those things most likely to occur.

If you are a soldier and actually live out in an War Zone, your training should reflect it...

HOWEVER, if you are a civilian living in a city or suburb, with a family, working a regular job, than train in those things that fit your situation...

Real Defense for Real People Begins with the Right Mindset!

Speaking of...

Click HERE to subscribe to my [Almost] Daily email where I'll share tips, tricks & tactics on having the right mindset for being a protector! 

Keep going,

Tuesday, January 14, 2020

Gallows Humor

This post could be seen as a bit of a follow up on my post about the Golden Globe Award monologue... 

Click HERE if you haven't read it yet!

Many folk that I know who have spent any time dealing w/people in crisis, be it medical emergencies (physical & mental), criminal behavior, security, military service, tough parenting, (bartending even) just to name a few...

You know, situations where there's potential for some serious sh*t to happen... Things like consequences and stuff we really, really don't want to happen physically, emotionally, socially, financially, you name it. Situations that are dire, when things are really on the line or feel like it.

The more the drama, conflict and violence we have to manage, the more we need to somehow find a way to deal emotionally with those circumstances (In the moment, before and after).

We have many ways of dealing...

Some healthy... others, not so much.

One way many of us deal is by having 'Gallows Humor'.

gal·lows hu·mor

/ˈɡalōz ˈ(h)yo͞omər/

Grim and ironic humor in a desperate or hopeless situation.

The darker and more serious the situation, the darker the humor can get...

However there are two (of many) things that can get in the way...

Modern Culture
A coroner's job is easy:

Every death is 'natural causes'...

"He was stabbed 15 times in the neck so, naturally, he died."


Two coroners cracking jokes about their last 'client' wouldn't be appropriate around the person's family...

And I'm sure no professional would share their humor in that context...


Now in today's day and age where we have more social / professional transparency than ever...

And as for boundaries on a personal and professional level!?!

Forget about it...

To say there is a lack would be an understatement.

This has resulted into some pretty substantial problems...

Now due to our interconnectiveness of the internet, people who aren't your friends (professional or not) are ALL seeing, hearing and reading your comments, jokes, pictures, videos, you name it.

Our personal & professional lives are on display & out in the open for all to see, which has repercussions both good and bad.

That comment that you might say, the smart a$$ remark you'd retort or off color joke you'd crack might be fine around you, your friends and colleagues.


They are not the only ones hearing those things now... EVERYONE is! =(

I don't know if this has contributed to our current oversensitivity, lack of tolerance, political correctness and loss of resiliency to pretty much everything, but it surely isn't helping!

Dark humor, irony and sarcasm have pretty much become illegal now-a-days. Being an a$$ hole has gotten to the point of being a federal offense.

I'm not advocating that anyone should be one, only that it shouldn't be illegal. It's one of the hidden costs of freedom.

With the state of the current affairs, it's a wonder I haven't been deported yet due to my disposition! =D

This is one of the reason's I'm not a huge advocate or participant of social media, be it fb, youtube, twitter or the like...

It's unbelievable what's going on out 'there'...

People getting fired, sued, even indited over tweets, posts and pics!

Part is the environment we're living in...

But, I have to be honest here...

You may or may not agree, but, some people are their own worse enemy!


Most of the stuff I'd lean over and say to my partner or friend would've gotten me in trouble 25 years ago if someone would've heard it, let alone plastering all over public networks of thousands (or more!) people... Most of whom you don't really even know...

Over sharing opinions, comments and things meant as jokes leaves room for things to be taken out of context or overheard by people who simply don't 'get' or agree w/those type of comments.

We all know that the squeaky wheel gets the grease so to speak, and it's easier than ever for these folks to share their feelings of being offended, appalled, disrespected or discriminated against... whatever.

And some of these folks aren't only sharing on line, some are taking organizational and legal action!

It's a problem!

We all have our own public reality shows now!

Congratulations you're a star! 

Which comes w/the good, bad and ugly being in the public eye, even if you didn't invite or want it!

Dark(er) Side of the Humor

Now, I believe that much of this type of humor and outlook comes from good people either who are dealing with a circumstance and/or (like me) they are just wired that way...

However, we do have to be careful because if out of balance, this type of humor and perspective can be thinly veiled indicators to true unhealthy behavior and in certain circumstances professional practices.

Also, if left unchecked, it can be the beginning to the slippery slope of desensitizing and dehumanizing people and situations...

We have to be careful not to have this type of perspective and humor build walls around our emotions, compassion and empathy that are essential for our relationships, jobs and lives.

Once again my brothers and sisters in arms...

It's a delicate balance.

Soap Boxes & Rabbit Holes

I didn't intend for this email to turn into such a rabbit hole...

However it is a good subject to talk about because it is an issue today!

No real solutions on this post, just a discussion... I do have some suggestions, but will save them for another time.

If you track at all with this, you might be interested in my [almost] Daily email subscription, complete w/a FREE 'Street Smart' Survival Guidebook that comes directly out of the PeaceWalker Protector System available only through my Exclusive $97/month Coaching Membership.

Here's the link to pick up your FREE Survival Guide & Start Getting My [almost] Daily tips!


Talk to you later.

Keep going,

Monday, January 6, 2020

3 Lessons From Ricky Gervais's Golden Globe Speech

If I were to say that I never watched the Golden Globe Awards that would be an understatement...

Well, I guess, now I'd be lying, because I just caught Ricky Gervais' Golden Globe Opening Speech and...


I'm sure what I have to say will end up losing us some of our subscribers, but...

Ah f-k it!

Ricky's speech was FUNNY!

If you haven't heard it yet...


Google it, watch it and then come back to read this post!

His humor a bit more up my alley than most of what we've been hearing the last several years now...

I can only hope that we might be getting our sense of humor back a little bit...

It's not about being raunchy... it's about not taking ourselves (and everything) so seriously.

It's tiring walking on egg shells all the time, since everyone is so offended about everything and anything now-a-days.

Everyone's feeling the stress, whether or not they even realize it!

It's exhausting!

Then theirs the hypocrisy of folks who tirelessly get on their political/agenda ridden soap boxes...

And I'm not just talking about the stars... But pretty much all of us out there on social media (& obviously if you're reading this, that statement would include yours truly as well)! =D

All that aside Ricky's speech can teach us a lot about defensive tactics and being a PeaceWalker!

NO! I'm am not just messing w/you... It really can!

And Here's How...

3 Things PeaceWalkers' Can Learn from Ricky Gervias's Golden Globe Speech:

1) Keep Your Sense of Humor: Life can be crazy & the people in it even crazier. Yes, real conflict and violence is serious business, but if you don't keep a sense of humor, you'll be less effective and headed for a mental health emergency in the long run!

*Spoiler Alert* No one's getting out of this Sh*t Show Alive... Yes, there is a lot of bad stuff going on out there, good people suffering, people doing evil things, puppies dying and the like...

But, we can't control it all! We have to learn to simply do the best we can w/what we have, be able to let go of what we cannot control. Don't let the bad stuff rob you of the joy of the good things in Life...

Follow the words my Grandma Lived by...

"For God's Sake... Stop Taking yourself So Seriously!"

There's a lot more to Life than all this doom and gloom! It can consume you if you're not careful!

2) Not Everyone will 'Get It': If you look at the faces of some of those celebs at that event listening to Ricky's speech, it was clear that not everyone was 'tracking' with him and his jokes. The same holds true when you're a PeaceWalker...

Yes, we are ALL Protectors, but not everyone 'Gets It' when it comes to protecting the right things. The 'Mush Balls' out there think its just about being nicer to people... It's not.

The 'Hard Chargers' don't quite have it either though! The answer isn't 'kill'em all and let God sort them out'!

It's a balance folks!

So, although EVERYONE's Capable of being a PeaceWalker... Not everyone get's it... Or get's you for that matter!

It's ok... Be Clear, Confident, have Skills and Keep Going!

3) You Have to Have Hutzpah (that's balls, cahonas (or cahon-ettes), you know, guts...): I don't think anyone would argue that Ricky had to have 'a pair' to stand up there and tell those jokes... Not to mention in the company of that audience! He has Hutzpah! And you're going to need some too if you want to be a PeaceWalker! Now there can be a fine line between guts and just being an arrogant, selfish blow hard...  It's a balance, but one worth learning! Because not only do you need to have Hutszpah to be a Tough Target and all around bad a$$ Protector, you need it to Live a Better Life too! Living the Life of a doormat is no way to Live. It actually paves the way to more conflict and violence!

Did I mention having a Healthy Balance!?

I believe I did...

I know it's a subjective statement.. but since you are a part of this community you either already get it... or keep reading... you will! =)

Keep going,

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