Here's the Thing w/Difficult Conversations...
There are many types of difficult conversations...
The ones I'm talking about today are those who we have with people we know and want to be able to trust.
You see, trust, in the most basic sense, is placing confidence in another person, and in return, them placing confidence in you.
In Brené Brown’s book, Daring Greatly, she shares a story of her young daughter losing trust in her best friends and her subsequent decision to never trust anyone again. Brené uses the analogy of a marble jar to help her daughter understand how trust is built.
Here's how it works:
Every person has a metaphoric 'Trust Jar' that marbles are added to or taken away from.
Here are some ways to add to the jar:
~ Spend quality time with that person
~ When they do good things for you (w/the right intent)
~ When they open up and share stories about themselves.
~ When they are honest with you.
The more stories, experiences and deeds they share, and the deeper they are, the more marbles you are able to add to their jar. It is easy to trust someone whose jar is overflowing.
The thing with difficult conversations is that sometimes if you don't have them, things can get MORE difficult later.!
Yes, yes, I know I've told you to pick your battles, and you should! However, when 'adulting' we have to also be willing to initiate and not avoid some conversations that need to happen.
Sometimes having a difficult conversation now will eliminate or at least reduce the likelihood of something worse happening down the road.
Keep in mind that these 'difficult conversations' can range from dealing with conflict, awkwardness, and serious subjects from across the spectrum of the human experience.
It's better to have several 'difficult conversations' with your kid now, when they're younger, rather than after they've developed some bad behavioral habits when they get to be teenagers and beyond!
It's better to have those difficult conversations with your employees tardiness now, rather than letting things slid and then just wanting to fire them... Later to be taken to court for wrongful dismissal... Or even being accused of something even worse.
It's better to address that awkward fight you had with your spouse or friend now, before it gets pushed under the rug and have that 'marble' taken out of the 'trust jar.'
It's Not For the Weak Hearted!
A big part of the PeaceWalker Approach (and thus membership) has to do with building confidence in conflict.
Learning how to physically defend yourself is key to this, but it doesn't stop there. You'll need more in order to deal with the types of real conflicts you run into on a daily basis.
Unfortunately training like this is very difficult to find!
The entire PeaceWalker Approach is helping you to See Conflict in a different way.
You can't fake true Confidence. Once you have it, you'll walk and talk differently. Knowing that you can defend yourself and handle whatever Life throws at you is a complete game changer!
When you find more peace inside of you and have the right skills, you may be amazed at how much more peace you'll create around you!
Want to go deeper into this?! Then check this out:
Talk to you later,